Why Black Women’s Hair and Makeup Preferences Aren’t Any of Your Business

This needs to be said.

Black Women have got to be the most crucified beings on the planet earth, especially now that we’ve found our voice and are breaking through glass ceilings everywhere.

The world worships those who try to imitate us, but demean the real thing, and I am tired!

And the worst part?

Some of the ones who demean Black Women the most are other Black Women.

We’ve literally been pitted against each other, and it’s such an atrocity.

But we gone hash this thing out today.

One of the biggest areas where I see critiques of Black Women have to do with the way we accessorize our beings: Hair and Makeup.

I briefly mentioned this topic in my Plastic Surgery post back in February (https://themelaninperspective.com/2020/02/25/plastic-surgery-yay-or-nay/), but now I’m really going to expound on the matter.

As you all may know, I am a Glamaholic who loves hair and makeup, and my social media explore pages reflect that.

I am always looking at hair and makeup tutorials on YouTube, Instagram, even Facebook, and I always see the same few comments on EVERY. SINGLE. VIDEO.

“That’s too much makeup on her face, she looked better natural.”

“Why doesn’t she embrace her natural hair, it looks better than this style.”

“Why is she putting heat in her hair, that’s going to damage it.”

Or maybe you’ve been to a family function, and you always hear these words:

“You need a perm, girl, your hair is too nappy to be out like that.”

“You need to start doing more with your face, you’ll never find a man looking like a tomboy all the time.”

“A lady needs to look put together all the time, so always keep your hair done and a little something on your face.”

Isn’t it ironic how these two scenarios contrast each other, while having the same effects?

Crazy stuff, man.

Let’s address the Natural fanatics first.

All you people who have the audacity to talk down on someone trying to teach others new skills for free, you have the option to not watch the video.

You even have the option to not comment on the video, if you end up watching it!

It is totally alright to not like a hairstyle or makeup look someone does, it is completely warranted to have your own preference.

It is not, however, warranted to insult someone else because of theirs.

You may not like the colorful wigs, but someone else out there does, and that’s who these influencers and stylists do it for!

You may not like the full-glam makeup look with whistles and bells, but there are people like me, who love experimenting with different looks.

There is just too much variety in beauty and hair content for you to be spreading hate on things you know you wouldn’t like to begin with.

You don’t think wigs and braids are protective styles?

Well for one, you’re wrong.

But if that’s your opinion, then go check out Influencers and Hairstylists who specialize in styling real hair.

You want a more natural beat?

Go check out Beauty Gurus and MUAs who focus on more natural makeup looks.

It’s not that hard, y’all.

And for you men, who boast so much about not wanting to be “catfished” because of a beat or style a Black Woman chooses to rock?

Let’s take a trip to your barber to see how real that beard is or talk about all that nonstop brushing you do with not a wave in sight yet.

Most of the time y’all can’t even tell the difference between a light makeup look and a bare face, so you have no domain here, sit down.

Just because someone likes to experiment with different looks, that does not mean they don’t embrace their natural selves.

Some people are just so diversified that they like to try switch things up a lot.

Just because someone wears loud hair or makeup, that does not mean they don’t have a lot of hair or that they’re ugly.

Often times, people who have do the most protective styles and wear the most makeup, have some of the best hair and skin in the game.

And that’s that.

On to the next!

A lot of those commercialized comments we’ve heard from family members stem from old cultural norms.

We know that back in the day perms and hot combs were a staple in the Black community because of how manageable it made our hair and for other unfortunate reasons like discrimination and outward validation.

Natural hair wasn’t deemed professional, nor attractive unless it was a certain texture.

So, naturally our families developed these deep-rooted beliefs that this was the “right way” of doing things.

Which, I get.

I really do.

But we are not in that time anymore, and while I have nothing against those to choose to relax their hair, condemning those that don’t is completely unacceptable.

It is so unfortunate that so many of our own people think that our natural kinks should be hidden.

And it’s also unfortunate that we as Black Women are pressured to keep up our appearances 24/7 as if we’re putting on a nonstop show.

I have heard too many stories of couples who were married for decades and the husbands never saw their wife’s bare faces, or their hair undone.

I get wanting to look presentable, especially when you go out, I aim to do that myself.

However.

Every person deserves the opportunity to not be put together in certain moments, especially with their life partner.

And honestly, even when I go out, as glamorous as I am, sometimes I don’t feel like wearing makeup or styling my hair properly.

No one looks “did up” all the time, but it seems Black women are the only ones criticized for it.

Do not condemn someone for choosing a more natural lifestyle.

Some people prefer the simpler things in life.

I understand that these two talking points may seem contradictory, and if you feel that way, then please reread this post.

The point I’m trying to make is that regardless of your preference, Loud or Natural, don’t insult someone else whose preference differs from yours.

Find what works for you, and keep it pushing!

Let me know what you think of this blog post in the comments below and on our social media pages!

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